period tumblr

i originally posted this in the summer:

stick a fork in me. i’m done.  no really, i have never ever felt this horrible ever.  i feel i should go into gross detail. no? you’d rather i wouldn’t?  ::claps hands and sits:: okay so, on the seventh of july, i started my period and at the time i was like “egh period, ok normal body functions, whatever.”  and so i accepted it.  i am a woman.  this is what we do, tough shit.  then my period was like, “you know what? i kind of like it here.  maybe i’ll get some property here”  and IT NEVER STOPPED.  IT HAS BEEN EXACTLY FOUR WEEKS AND I AM STILL FUCKING BLEEDING.  and besides the fact that my period has decided to live here forever, it’s also fucking rude.  i can not leave the house without at least four tampons in my purse.  not the cute, mini ones, either.  i’m talking super jumbo, people.  at first i thought, hmm, maybe my body needs to cleanse itself out.  after this, i’ll be clean.  then into the second week, i found myself in a bathroom stall at school, crying after i ruined my favorite underwear.  it was too much.  it wasn’t normal. it was a long, obnoxious, rude period. this of course has not just been the only weird thing going on in my body.  because i’ve been losing so much blood, i’ve been getting weak.  i think it’s my heart, which is working extra extra hard to make up for all the blood loss, but it makes me so tired to do simple ordinary things. i try to do my make up in the morning and i have to sit down.  i’m also extremely anemic now.  my hair’s falling out. i am falling apart people! and when i ask my sister to help me with the groceries and she rolls her eyes because i’m obviously exaggerating, well, i’d like to punch her fucking head in.   but i can’t summon the energy to do it :( . 

i have an appointment with a gynecologist later today.  a nice receptionist from said gyno actually called me yesterday to ask me all about my life.  it was a pleasant phone call.  after she asked me for my age, number, email, social security number, texas id, and my insurance, she calmly asked how many abortions i had, and how long i had been sexually active.  i had no problem answering this, but the dude at office depot that i was simultaneously talking to at the time was like, “whoa lady, i did not need to know this about you.”  after i started describing in great detail the appearance of the blood clots that was gushing out of my vagina, he quickly handed me my copies and my change.  it would be embarrassing under any other circumstance, but i’m actually kind of glad that someone else felt a little discomfort along with me.  welcome to my world, bitches.

update:  the gynecologist did shit for me.  he said it was a cyst on my ovaries, but instead of scheduling surgery to get it out, he’d rather do nothing because he wants me to have a million babies.  so i spent three months and about four thousand dollars on tests to find out that i couldn’t do anything and that my kidneys were ok, just in case i was wondering.  motherfuckers.